I am not a poet
Because I already know it.
You try to show me but you are phony
And you try to phone me
Like ring ring
But I’m coming with the bling bling
I’m talking cha ching ching
And I hear the money sing sing.
You try to inspire
But I’m coming with the fire
I’m dropping bars like I’m dropping cars
Like Disney’s Pixar
I am the elixir.
By Dylan Mertzdorf

I am not a poet
Because I don’t know what to write.
I hate poetry because I’m too bright.
When people spit out a rhyme
They should go to jail for their crime.
I am not a poet
Because poetry is supposed to be deep
But when I read it — all I hear is “beeeep”
And poetry is over-dramatic
I would rather sit up in my attic.
I am not a poet
Because to write a poem you need creativity
And I am better at doing physical activity.
To write poetry you need a lot of free time
But I have a life — so I’m just fine.
By Nicole Cohen and Jen Adler